Well, the time has finally come.
I have officially been on American soil for 4 days. On day two I had my first Chipotle in a year. Ironically, it was the first burrito the ignoramus employee had ever made in his life, so he completely botched it and the whole thing tore open within three bites. I was on the verge of tears (think Patrick Bateman when he realized the superiority of Paul Allen's Business bard. That's bone.) I cannot begin to describe my utter disgust and loathing towards this incompetent dingbat. I have been dreaming of this first burrito for months and he completely ruined it. He put the peppers in before the rice. Instant disaster. Did he honestly think, just by looking at me, that I didn't want the cilantro enhanced rice? It took every ounce of self control not to assault him and ask for it to be remade by the Mexican chica with gold frames on her teeth. She has skill, unlike the no-talent-assclown in charge of my meal. Moving on, albeit bitterly.
It's a very odd feeling. I anticipated a massive sense of relief upon my arrival, but so far it has been anything but. I got to catch up with tons of friends on Saturday night, despite being caught in the Twilight Zone that is jetlag. That was great fun, but it only made me want to move into the city more. Compared to Australia, you get incredible bang for your buck in terms of accommodation. Some girl friends had a house warming party and their place was absolutely glorious. I need to move into the city, stat. It has also been great to catch up with my parents and I will see my sister in a week or so.
Without trying to sound like your typical faux-cultured college student who spent a semester drinking with Americans in/and around Italy and came home donning capri pants, obnoxious leather sandals, and some sort of beaded jewelry and bragging about cheap wine and fast women... it really has been a culture shock being back in my beloved motherland. I'm not saying that I would ever want to have an Australian accent, but there is something about it that suggests a more lighthearted and congenial attitude than that of an American, in your face, accent. I guess it is similar to a pleasant southern accent (south east aristocrat....not alabama degenerate, natural disaster victim, trailer park swine). Don't get me wrong, midwesterners are kind, lovely people, but the formality of social interaction is extremely shocking at this point. I don't think I used the word "Mister" for an entire year. Thats not a word of a lie. Unless I was casually mocking someone...Ohhhhh check out Mr. Big Shot, etc.
On the subject of social interaction, it has been very difficult to stop saying a few aussie slang terms. First off, "mate" is horribly difficult to replace with something as boring and American sounding as "man" or "dude." I used to bank on those, but I really have learned to enjoy "mate." Unfortunately, that is COMPLETELY unacceptable to use in American dialect. A couple more subtle terms/phrases/sounds that are proving difficult to eradicate are:
1) Mmmmmm - Used when in agreement. Need to get rid of it because I don't like it at all.
2) Ya Yaaaaa, No - Used when someone is asking you something towards which you will provide a negative response. The ya's are a way to segway into your turn to talk.
3) Awwww, yaaa, listen - Another conversational segway that I catch myself saying
4) Cheers- Now, this is debatable. The way I see it, it can be an unconventional way to sign off emails, notes, texts, etc, BUT only if you haven't just spent a year in Australia. In my case, it just makes me seem like I want the attention and I think I am really cool because I've been away for a year. (See aforementioned faux-cultured douche)
5) Aw Craike! Get a dog up ya, ya flaming gallah! - Casual insult I threw at someone the other night without thinking twice about it. Totally american, right?
Aside from the accent, the culture will definitely be missed. My personality gelled very well with the Aussies because I am typically a pretty laid back guy. That being said, I have been raised to bleed red, white, and blue (oh wait, that's their colors too, ummmm, crimson, porcelain, and azure?) and to work hard and be happy with my American values. In the coming months, this will mean completely abandoning the blithe existence in which I have relished for the last year. Its time to buckle down, find a job, save some green backs, and move into the city!
I guess this will be my last blog post, which is sort of depressing. It has been a very fun way to keep you all updated and, hopefully, a little bit entertained. I will probably start a new life blog that will be far less interesting, but I enjoy writing and ranting, so it will happen. I just need to think of a catchy title. I don't think Wes Up Over is too good.
Thanks to everyone for following and I hope it was as good for you as it was for me. Cheers Mates!
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Monday, September 6, 2010
Exodus
Well, the lacrosse season is over.
We made it to the semi-final and on a rain-soaked pitch covered with areas of nearly 10 square yards where the thought of dodging is a complete joke, the Footscray Bulldogs lost to Surrey Park 9-8. We were down by 3 with five minutes to go. Eventually we tied it up with a minute to go and had ALL the momentum. That is, until we got a minute slash called on us. They manged to get a one on one and score with 20 seconds left and won the ensuing face-off. It was a rough loss, but it was the best season in team history, so there was much cause for celebration. And celebrate we did.
Apart from mandatory post game beers, the import players (yanks, as we are so graciously called) are invited (read: forced) to participate in the age-old tradition of "Pole to Pole."
The Footscray Lacrosse club is situated on about an acre of land with the capability to make 4-6 full fields. The Pole to Pole tradition is a test of endurance, stomach capacity, confidence, and, perhaps most importantly, showmanship.
To begin, each import (3 yanks and 1 Japanese goalkeeper who takes about an hour to drink half a beer) is given a pitcher of beer. As I have surely mentioned, the concept of light beer is STRONGLY frowned upon by Australian males. It is akin to drinking a Mike's Hard Lemonade with a straw in the states. That being said, our pitchers were filled with Victoria Bitter, the Budweiser of Australia. After being about 5-6 beers deep at this point, chugging and entire pitcher in front of a hundred or so rabid players and fans expecting a serious performance is quite a daunting task. Well at least I can take down Tai, our lightweight friend from the Orient. Wrong.
As we started the debauchery, we Americans are somewhat pacing ourselves to get past the foam, but still holding our own. By the time we are about halfway finished, Tai is celebrating his much deserved victory. What a snake in the grass! He absolutely dominated us while various members of the crowd were shouting "Pearl Harbor!!" Whatever, we dropped da bomb. Twice. That settles that.
After we finish the pitchers (I got third place, miserable performance), we are instructed to go into the locker room and "get our kit off" because we are running to the end of the field and back in the nude. In the cold. With a hundred or so watching and filming.
Now, I am a decorated veteran in the art of streaking (Women's Highschool Lacrosse Semi-Final (whoops, that was the baseball team, right?), Mary Markly Cafeteria during Sunday Brunch, Law Quad countless times, etc. etc.), but there has never been a significant presence of filming equipment. Oh, well, we thought. Lets put on a show. After the initial run to the other end, all four of us linked shoulders and skipped back, then proceeded to slide on our stomachs through the patches of mud. Classic. Riley had to do this a few months ago with a bum knee, which is impressive, but ours was voted the "best pole to pole ever."
The madness continued through the night capping off a great experience playing lacrosse in Australia.
In other news, my room mate Jack is leaving Australia in a few short hours. Having him leaving is really making me excited to get home. I have a few things to look forward to in the next few weeks, but as much fun as I have had in OZ, it is time to get home and start a real life. The experience of living in utter poverty has been quite eye-opening and taught me some great lessons. I still think welfare is bullshit even though I could qualify for it here in a heartbeat. Won't stoop to the level of a societal leech anytime soon.
My last day of work is on Friday and I will then have about two weeks to tie up all of the loose ends and say my good-byes/see you laters. The great thing about traveling, especially in a place like Australia, is that fact that you meet and become close friends SO MANY people from all over the place because you are all in the same boat. Many of these people are compulsive travelers and are making plans to visit the US. I let them know how much our girls will melt like butter when presented with an Aussie accent. They book flights immediately. Girls, don't let me down!
I'll probably do a few more posts when I am off work as I will have plenty of down time so keep checking in!
TaTa for now and whatever you do, don't read Anthony's blog. He told me that he doesn't have to do it for class. Rather, he has been so moved by WesDownUnder that he wanted to copy me. He begged for me not to tell anyone because he is really embarrassed. He frequently is asking me for advice on humor and wit. Clearly, my advice has not set in as his blog is completely devoid of anything remotely funny. Just kidding...but seriously.
AREEEBA DARE-CHEE
We made it to the semi-final and on a rain-soaked pitch covered with areas of nearly 10 square yards where the thought of dodging is a complete joke, the Footscray Bulldogs lost to Surrey Park 9-8. We were down by 3 with five minutes to go. Eventually we tied it up with a minute to go and had ALL the momentum. That is, until we got a minute slash called on us. They manged to get a one on one and score with 20 seconds left and won the ensuing face-off. It was a rough loss, but it was the best season in team history, so there was much cause for celebration. And celebrate we did.
Apart from mandatory post game beers, the import players (yanks, as we are so graciously called) are invited (read: forced) to participate in the age-old tradition of "Pole to Pole."
The Footscray Lacrosse club is situated on about an acre of land with the capability to make 4-6 full fields. The Pole to Pole tradition is a test of endurance, stomach capacity, confidence, and, perhaps most importantly, showmanship.
To begin, each import (3 yanks and 1 Japanese goalkeeper who takes about an hour to drink half a beer) is given a pitcher of beer. As I have surely mentioned, the concept of light beer is STRONGLY frowned upon by Australian males. It is akin to drinking a Mike's Hard Lemonade with a straw in the states. That being said, our pitchers were filled with Victoria Bitter, the Budweiser of Australia. After being about 5-6 beers deep at this point, chugging and entire pitcher in front of a hundred or so rabid players and fans expecting a serious performance is quite a daunting task. Well at least I can take down Tai, our lightweight friend from the Orient. Wrong.
As we started the debauchery, we Americans are somewhat pacing ourselves to get past the foam, but still holding our own. By the time we are about halfway finished, Tai is celebrating his much deserved victory. What a snake in the grass! He absolutely dominated us while various members of the crowd were shouting "Pearl Harbor!!" Whatever, we dropped da bomb. Twice. That settles that.
After we finish the pitchers (I got third place, miserable performance), we are instructed to go into the locker room and "get our kit off" because we are running to the end of the field and back in the nude. In the cold. With a hundred or so watching and filming.
Now, I am a decorated veteran in the art of streaking (Women's Highschool Lacrosse Semi-Final (whoops, that was the baseball team, right?), Mary Markly Cafeteria during Sunday Brunch, Law Quad countless times, etc. etc.), but there has never been a significant presence of filming equipment. Oh, well, we thought. Lets put on a show. After the initial run to the other end, all four of us linked shoulders and skipped back, then proceeded to slide on our stomachs through the patches of mud. Classic. Riley had to do this a few months ago with a bum knee, which is impressive, but ours was voted the "best pole to pole ever."
The madness continued through the night capping off a great experience playing lacrosse in Australia.
In other news, my room mate Jack is leaving Australia in a few short hours. Having him leaving is really making me excited to get home. I have a few things to look forward to in the next few weeks, but as much fun as I have had in OZ, it is time to get home and start a real life. The experience of living in utter poverty has been quite eye-opening and taught me some great lessons. I still think welfare is bullshit even though I could qualify for it here in a heartbeat. Won't stoop to the level of a societal leech anytime soon.
My last day of work is on Friday and I will then have about two weeks to tie up all of the loose ends and say my good-byes/see you laters. The great thing about traveling, especially in a place like Australia, is that fact that you meet and become close friends SO MANY people from all over the place because you are all in the same boat. Many of these people are compulsive travelers and are making plans to visit the US. I let them know how much our girls will melt like butter when presented with an Aussie accent. They book flights immediately. Girls, don't let me down!
I'll probably do a few more posts when I am off work as I will have plenty of down time so keep checking in!
TaTa for now and whatever you do, don't read Anthony's blog. He told me that he doesn't have to do it for class. Rather, he has been so moved by WesDownUnder that he wanted to copy me. He begged for me not to tell anyone because he is really embarrassed. He frequently is asking me for advice on humor and wit. Clearly, my advice has not set in as his blog is completely devoid of anything remotely funny. Just kidding...but seriously.
AREEEBA DARE-CHEE
Monday, August 30, 2010
oh yeah...
I forgot to mention this in the last post...the video documenting Riley and my trip has been finished for a while, but due to the lack of good internet availability, I will have to wait until I get home to post it. Its worth the wait. Be jealous. Be very jealous.
11 months down, 1 to go...
I truly never thought this day would come. The day that I realize that I will be returning to the US of A in a few short, but high intensity weeks.
The main focus of life right now is lacrosse and work. Lacrosse is going very well. We beat the #1 team (whom the footscray lacrosse club has never beaten in its history) for our last game of the regular season, Following a bye week we had the first final. The system is really weird here. We were ranked #2 at the end of the season and the top 4 teams make the finals. On saturday, we played #1 Williamstown for the second time in two weeks. The #3 and #4 teams played just before us. The loser of #3 and #4 was eliminated from the finals. We had a tough loss in front of a couple thousand people, but luckily because of our position at #2, we live to fight another day.
This saturday we will play #3 Surrey Park. If we win that game we will play Williamstown in the Grand Final.
Its pretty odd playing against Williamstown. They are regarded the same way as Michigan is in the MCLA (not to mention their maize and blue kits). They hardly ever lose and they have the swagger to match. One of their stud players was an attackmen in the MLL for a while. To make it weirder, our colors are Green and White, so I feel like a certain degenerate little brother playing against someone in maize and blue. Wish us luck!
In terms of work, our business has doubled since the arrival of the FIRST GAP IN AUSTRALIA right across the hall. I don't know whether I am more baffled at the fact that GAP had not made the move to Australia, or the fact that people are actually excited about its arrival. I mean...sure, it stands for the pinnacle of western society (namely, middle-class America), but how long will it take them to realize that once people of my generation wore out our last pair of baggy carpenter jeans with bottom cuffs big enough to fit ski boots that aside from the casual pair of boxer briefs, GAP has become merely a faint memory into a time of braces, squeaky voices, unbridled awkwardness, and learning how to prevent run-on sentences in grammar school?
I am not pretending to be some master of fashion, but there is absolutely zero reason for there to be a 2 hour line just to have the ability, nay, the PRIVILEDGE to spend your hard earned dough on something that is backed by the the Anti-Christ Sarah Jessica Parker. Hopefully people will soon realize this and get their panties, or boxer briefs as the case may be, out of a bunch and stop causing mass hunger and caffeine induced hysteria.
Oh well, gotta keep food on the table, right?
My roommate Jack, and last surviving member of the original crew out here is leaving in a week. It would be pretty rough being more or less a one man wolf pack, but at least I have all of the lacrosse boys. They are a good time. Trust me. Trust. Me. Its pretty odd to think of all of the travelers that I have become close with whilst in Australia, I will be the last man standing. We all planned on doing a year, but for various reasons, people cut their time short. Screw that. One year. Count it.
That being said, I am extremely excited to get home. Just the thought of a refridgerator and pantry full of hearty snacks and meals is enough to warm my loins. Once we start to consider unlimited wireless internet and , MY GOD, ON DEMAND TELEVISION! HD TELEVISION! A COMFORTABLE BED! A CAR!!!!!!!!!!!! I repeat...a CAR!!!!, thats when I have to control myself in public. Football season...ugh.
These various voids in my life have inspired my to make a top 10 list of purely material things that I miss in order of importance:
1)Bountiful Supply of Food (at least while I am living at home)
2)Unlimited Wireless Internet
3)The Ability to Drive My Own Car...on the right side
4)Comcast Digital Cable...one can only watch some much cricket, scrubs, two and a half men, and simpsons re-runs
5)Chipotle/Taco Bell
6)Unlimited Cell Phone Data Usage on iPhone
7)American Sports in crystal clear 1080p (or whatever it is now)
8)My guitars...serious withdrawls
9)Cheap Beer
10)Cheap Beer from the Lantern
I'm sure the list could go on for ages, but I am being kicked out of this internet cafe and I need to scrape together some money for dinner.
Now to find a job...craike
The main focus of life right now is lacrosse and work. Lacrosse is going very well. We beat the #1 team (whom the footscray lacrosse club has never beaten in its history) for our last game of the regular season, Following a bye week we had the first final. The system is really weird here. We were ranked #2 at the end of the season and the top 4 teams make the finals. On saturday, we played #1 Williamstown for the second time in two weeks. The #3 and #4 teams played just before us. The loser of #3 and #4 was eliminated from the finals. We had a tough loss in front of a couple thousand people, but luckily because of our position at #2, we live to fight another day.
This saturday we will play #3 Surrey Park. If we win that game we will play Williamstown in the Grand Final.
Its pretty odd playing against Williamstown. They are regarded the same way as Michigan is in the MCLA (not to mention their maize and blue kits). They hardly ever lose and they have the swagger to match. One of their stud players was an attackmen in the MLL for a while. To make it weirder, our colors are Green and White, so I feel like a certain degenerate little brother playing against someone in maize and blue. Wish us luck!
In terms of work, our business has doubled since the arrival of the FIRST GAP IN AUSTRALIA right across the hall. I don't know whether I am more baffled at the fact that GAP had not made the move to Australia, or the fact that people are actually excited about its arrival. I mean...sure, it stands for the pinnacle of western society (namely, middle-class America), but how long will it take them to realize that once people of my generation wore out our last pair of baggy carpenter jeans with bottom cuffs big enough to fit ski boots that aside from the casual pair of boxer briefs, GAP has become merely a faint memory into a time of braces, squeaky voices, unbridled awkwardness, and learning how to prevent run-on sentences in grammar school?
I am not pretending to be some master of fashion, but there is absolutely zero reason for there to be a 2 hour line just to have the ability, nay, the PRIVILEDGE to spend your hard earned dough on something that is backed by the the Anti-Christ Sarah Jessica Parker. Hopefully people will soon realize this and get their panties, or boxer briefs as the case may be, out of a bunch and stop causing mass hunger and caffeine induced hysteria.
Oh well, gotta keep food on the table, right?
My roommate Jack, and last surviving member of the original crew out here is leaving in a week. It would be pretty rough being more or less a one man wolf pack, but at least I have all of the lacrosse boys. They are a good time. Trust me. Trust. Me. Its pretty odd to think of all of the travelers that I have become close with whilst in Australia, I will be the last man standing. We all planned on doing a year, but for various reasons, people cut their time short. Screw that. One year. Count it.
That being said, I am extremely excited to get home. Just the thought of a refridgerator and pantry full of hearty snacks and meals is enough to warm my loins. Once we start to consider unlimited wireless internet and , MY GOD, ON DEMAND TELEVISION! HD TELEVISION! A COMFORTABLE BED! A CAR!!!!!!!!!!!! I repeat...a CAR!!!!, thats when I have to control myself in public. Football season...ugh.
These various voids in my life have inspired my to make a top 10 list of purely material things that I miss in order of importance:
1)Bountiful Supply of Food (at least while I am living at home)
2)Unlimited Wireless Internet
3)The Ability to Drive My Own Car...on the right side
4)Comcast Digital Cable...one can only watch some much cricket, scrubs, two and a half men, and simpsons re-runs
5)Chipotle/Taco Bell
6)Unlimited Cell Phone Data Usage on iPhone
7)American Sports in crystal clear 1080p (or whatever it is now)
8)My guitars...serious withdrawls
9)Cheap Beer
10)Cheap Beer from the Lantern
I'm sure the list could go on for ages, but I am being kicked out of this internet cafe and I need to scrape together some money for dinner.
Now to find a job...craike
Sunday, June 27, 2010
The Home Stretch
G'day all!
It has been quite a while since I have updated this bad boy. The last time I wrote was just before headed on a quick weekend trip down the Great Ocean Road. That trip was very fun. It is an absolutely amazing road. Driving on the wrong side of the road around hairpin turns with sheer drops into the ocean require extreme concentration. Unluckily for Riley, he chose to drive first...
On our way there we found a Thirsty Camel Drive Through Beer Store. A concept which I still find hard to come to grips with. Suspect franchise aside, we picked up some beers and all of the non-drivers started sipping (which is totally legal in Australia, relax mom) before the real drive began. Before we knew it, there was a party going on in the car and poor Riley had to suffer through not only having to watch the road as opposed to the scenery, but maintaining complete focus. Sucker. The rest of the trip was fun. The 12 Apostles are exactly what you would imagine: breathtaking for about an hour then you go home. That weekend was merely a warm-up lap for the mammoth road trip to come.
Given the window of opportunity of a three week mid-season break from lacrose, Riley and I used his final weeks in Australia on the road completeing the majority of the Australian East Coast. And it was sweet.
I made sure to bring along the ole video camera and I am half way through a video that documents our trip. I won't spoil any details, as the video will be up here and on vimeo within a week, but here is a basic outline. And by basic, I mean less that bare bones.
Day 1: Wake up/stay up until 4:00 am to get a cab to Melbourne Airport. Fly to Brisbane, which is in Southern Queensland (the most northeastern territory). Pick up the Campervan. Drive to Surfer's Paradise. Walk around various surf shops realizing that we are too American/unable to surf/broke to buy any of the fresh mondo tubular clothes. Drive to Byron Bay. Realize that we have entered the greatest place in Australia, as you will see in the video.
Day 2-5: Hang out and do various cheeky activities in Byron Bay.
Day 6: Begin the route to Sydney, stopping over in some random fishing town for the night.
Day 7: Wake up in the van parked on the beach. Drive to Sydney to see Casey Krauss and her friends for the night.
Day 8: Check out Sydney and decide to stay another night
Day 9-10: Buy lackluster camping supplies and head into the wilderness of the Blue Mountains to camp/hike. Nearly freeze to death at night and sweat profusely while hiking out of the valley. Use compass. Feel like Bear Grylls.
Day 11-14: Stay in various random towns along a stunning coastal drive ending in Melbourne. Get lost a few times. Bask in own Glory. Enjoy depleting hygene.
As the video will show, the road trip was an amazing time. A great send off for Riley.
The last few weeks have been fairly routine. Work, Lacrosse, etc. On a positive note, two nights ago a great friend from earlier in the trip came back to Melbourne and is living with us. He is a MASSIVE Liverpool Soccer fan and it was pretty brutal to watch the demise of England's World Cup Dreams with him last night. He is a horror. It was fun to see the US do fairly well, but in the end...We don't like soccer right? Unless we win that is. Its nice having a history of mediocrity and cynicism to fall back on after losing to Ghana. I'd like to think of it as letting others have a turn with the shiny new toy that is dominating everything. Enjoy it Ghana. You'll be back to doing...well...ummm...whatever it is that you do when you aren't practicing for the world cup. Herding?
This week will end on a very sober note as I will be missing the single greatest day to be an American (all things considered, that must be a pretty damn good day): The Fourth of July.
Even though I am having an amazing experience in Australia, there is nothing in the world that I would rather do than arrive at the Dobbins household at 8:30 am to begin everyone's favorite day of the year.
8:30 am: Break into first ice cold Miller Lite in a red solo Cup from one of four kegs.
8:42 am: Realize how quickly that beer snuck up on you because of the Lantern the night before. Make way to popcorn machine.
8:50 am: Game time
9:30 am: Enjoy talking to family friends about future plans. And by enjoy, I mean tell the same repetitive speal to thirty to forty people. Last year mine was, "Hey, yeah, I'm actually moving Australia for a year to play semi-pro lacrosse...Yeah, you know, it will be a good year off...such a tough job market and Ive always wanted to do it...Yeah Im serious. I am actually going. The flight is booked...Yes they play lacrosse there...Is that...sorry Mr. (family friend name here) I need to go speak to Mr. (insert other family friend name here).
9:31 am: Grab another Miller Lite
9:32 am: Start talking to Mr. (other family friend name here). "Hey, yeah, I'm actually moving Australia for a year to play semi-pro lacrosse...Yeah, you know, it will be a good year off...such a tough job market. Et Cetra, Et Cetra.
Semi-Pro lacrosse...hah overstatement of the decade. More like semi-serious. Really fun though.
10:30 am: Get psyched for the parade to begin.
10:32 am: Tell friends of syblings that I will not get them a beer. We did it on our own, they can do it all on their own. No one cares. Just dont be an ass about it.
10:38 am: Kids start to be asses about it. Oh well, I guess we were too
10:45 am: Get table-topped by Chris McNelly and vow to get him when he least expects it.
10:47 am: Watch my own back as everyone in sight is being table topped. This is just what George Washington had in mind to celebrate our Independence.
11:02 am: Watch the LFHS Pom Squad do their routine. Feel old. Feel creepy. Take a gulp of Miller Lite. Sob. Feel the need to wash my hands.
11:08 am: Mock the marching band from Glenbard East Metro playing Don't Stop Believing. Praise the Lord that I am Wes McGowan sitting on Chris Dobbins' front lawn and not the sweaty, acne harboring dungeons and dragons grand champion brandishing a recently polished trombone in a delightfully unflattering one-piece suit that highlights the extra forty pounds of flab attributed to hot pockets and pizza bagels in the bread basket and the distinct lack of a rear end except for the three square inches of nylon being devourned by the diminished crack. At least my extra five to seven lbs is from something cool. Beer and mom's cooking.
11:18 am: The moment we've all been waiting for: The Lawn Mower Brigade. Debate exactly what satirical theme they are going for this year. Something to do with Michael Jackson...or the pope? Quickly realize that they are really only funny because they are piss drunk middle aged men that should be hidden from all women and children and potentially given DUIs or public intox.
11:30 am: Parade is finished. Continue socializing.
12:00 pm: The Dobbins' are shutting up shop. Time to move. COnvince the weak that a nap is a horrendous decision that will have serious consequences. Go Dave's house and, god willing, enjoy round two of the greatest party in the history of Lake Forest.
All of that is before noon. As I said and anyone will attest, the greatest day to be American (and from Lake Forest/Lake Bluff).
Back to Australia:
I am here for just over two more months. It is all going to be pretty routine with lacrosse and work taking up all of my time, but it is a great routine.
Look out for the video soon. It will make your day. Or you will have too slow of a connection and get pissed off at the HD content and watch 2 minutes of it. Here's to hoping for the former.
Cheers
It has been quite a while since I have updated this bad boy. The last time I wrote was just before headed on a quick weekend trip down the Great Ocean Road. That trip was very fun. It is an absolutely amazing road. Driving on the wrong side of the road around hairpin turns with sheer drops into the ocean require extreme concentration. Unluckily for Riley, he chose to drive first...
On our way there we found a Thirsty Camel Drive Through Beer Store. A concept which I still find hard to come to grips with. Suspect franchise aside, we picked up some beers and all of the non-drivers started sipping (which is totally legal in Australia, relax mom) before the real drive began. Before we knew it, there was a party going on in the car and poor Riley had to suffer through not only having to watch the road as opposed to the scenery, but maintaining complete focus. Sucker. The rest of the trip was fun. The 12 Apostles are exactly what you would imagine: breathtaking for about an hour then you go home. That weekend was merely a warm-up lap for the mammoth road trip to come.
Given the window of opportunity of a three week mid-season break from lacrose, Riley and I used his final weeks in Australia on the road completeing the majority of the Australian East Coast. And it was sweet.
I made sure to bring along the ole video camera and I am half way through a video that documents our trip. I won't spoil any details, as the video will be up here and on vimeo within a week, but here is a basic outline. And by basic, I mean less that bare bones.
Day 1: Wake up/stay up until 4:00 am to get a cab to Melbourne Airport. Fly to Brisbane, which is in Southern Queensland (the most northeastern territory). Pick up the Campervan. Drive to Surfer's Paradise. Walk around various surf shops realizing that we are too American/unable to surf/broke to buy any of the fresh mondo tubular clothes. Drive to Byron Bay. Realize that we have entered the greatest place in Australia, as you will see in the video.
Day 2-5: Hang out and do various cheeky activities in Byron Bay.
Day 6: Begin the route to Sydney, stopping over in some random fishing town for the night.
Day 7: Wake up in the van parked on the beach. Drive to Sydney to see Casey Krauss and her friends for the night.
Day 8: Check out Sydney and decide to stay another night
Day 9-10: Buy lackluster camping supplies and head into the wilderness of the Blue Mountains to camp/hike. Nearly freeze to death at night and sweat profusely while hiking out of the valley. Use compass. Feel like Bear Grylls.
Day 11-14: Stay in various random towns along a stunning coastal drive ending in Melbourne. Get lost a few times. Bask in own Glory. Enjoy depleting hygene.
As the video will show, the road trip was an amazing time. A great send off for Riley.
The last few weeks have been fairly routine. Work, Lacrosse, etc. On a positive note, two nights ago a great friend from earlier in the trip came back to Melbourne and is living with us. He is a MASSIVE Liverpool Soccer fan and it was pretty brutal to watch the demise of England's World Cup Dreams with him last night. He is a horror. It was fun to see the US do fairly well, but in the end...We don't like soccer right? Unless we win that is. Its nice having a history of mediocrity and cynicism to fall back on after losing to Ghana. I'd like to think of it as letting others have a turn with the shiny new toy that is dominating everything. Enjoy it Ghana. You'll be back to doing...well...ummm...whatever it is that you do when you aren't practicing for the world cup. Herding?
This week will end on a very sober note as I will be missing the single greatest day to be an American (all things considered, that must be a pretty damn good day): The Fourth of July.
Even though I am having an amazing experience in Australia, there is nothing in the world that I would rather do than arrive at the Dobbins household at 8:30 am to begin everyone's favorite day of the year.
8:30 am: Break into first ice cold Miller Lite in a red solo Cup from one of four kegs.
8:42 am: Realize how quickly that beer snuck up on you because of the Lantern the night before. Make way to popcorn machine.
8:50 am: Game time
9:30 am: Enjoy talking to family friends about future plans. And by enjoy, I mean tell the same repetitive speal to thirty to forty people. Last year mine was, "Hey, yeah, I'm actually moving Australia for a year to play semi-pro lacrosse...Yeah, you know, it will be a good year off...such a tough job market and Ive always wanted to do it...Yeah Im serious. I am actually going. The flight is booked...Yes they play lacrosse there...Is that...sorry Mr. (family friend name here) I need to go speak to Mr. (insert other family friend name here).
9:31 am: Grab another Miller Lite
9:32 am: Start talking to Mr. (other family friend name here). "Hey, yeah, I'm actually moving Australia for a year to play semi-pro lacrosse...Yeah, you know, it will be a good year off...such a tough job market. Et Cetra, Et Cetra.
Semi-Pro lacrosse...hah overstatement of the decade. More like semi-serious. Really fun though.
10:30 am: Get psyched for the parade to begin.
10:32 am: Tell friends of syblings that I will not get them a beer. We did it on our own, they can do it all on their own. No one cares. Just dont be an ass about it.
10:38 am: Kids start to be asses about it. Oh well, I guess we were too
10:45 am: Get table-topped by Chris McNelly and vow to get him when he least expects it.
10:47 am: Watch my own back as everyone in sight is being table topped. This is just what George Washington had in mind to celebrate our Independence.
11:02 am: Watch the LFHS Pom Squad do their routine. Feel old. Feel creepy. Take a gulp of Miller Lite. Sob. Feel the need to wash my hands.
11:08 am: Mock the marching band from Glenbard East Metro playing Don't Stop Believing. Praise the Lord that I am Wes McGowan sitting on Chris Dobbins' front lawn and not the sweaty, acne harboring dungeons and dragons grand champion brandishing a recently polished trombone in a delightfully unflattering one-piece suit that highlights the extra forty pounds of flab attributed to hot pockets and pizza bagels in the bread basket and the distinct lack of a rear end except for the three square inches of nylon being devourned by the diminished crack. At least my extra five to seven lbs is from something cool. Beer and mom's cooking.
11:18 am: The moment we've all been waiting for: The Lawn Mower Brigade. Debate exactly what satirical theme they are going for this year. Something to do with Michael Jackson...or the pope? Quickly realize that they are really only funny because they are piss drunk middle aged men that should be hidden from all women and children and potentially given DUIs or public intox.
11:30 am: Parade is finished. Continue socializing.
12:00 pm: The Dobbins' are shutting up shop. Time to move. COnvince the weak that a nap is a horrendous decision that will have serious consequences. Go Dave's house and, god willing, enjoy round two of the greatest party in the history of Lake Forest.
All of that is before noon. As I said and anyone will attest, the greatest day to be American (and from Lake Forest/Lake Bluff).
Back to Australia:
I am here for just over two more months. It is all going to be pretty routine with lacrosse and work taking up all of my time, but it is a great routine.
Look out for the video soon. It will make your day. Or you will have too slow of a connection and get pissed off at the HD content and watch 2 minutes of it. Here's to hoping for the former.
Cheers
Monday, May 24, 2010
ROOOAD TRIP
'Ello, 'Ello,
Since my last post there has been several exciting developments. Riley's knee is officially torn, but he has taken a page out of Tom Selleck's book and grown a mustache. Incidentally, when you have a mustache you are no longer prone to the effects of pain.
That being said, we are taking two adventures in two weeks. The first of which begins in two hours.
Part 1: The Great Ocean Road
The Great Ocean Road is the iconic drive along the coast headed West out of Melbourne. It is home to the Twelve Apostles...
All five room mates are attending the journey and we are taking a hilarious old station wagon. I am looking forward to driving for the first time in 7 MONTHS. Chew on that for a while. Since being 16 I have driven a car almost every day. Now I get to completely relearn everything by driving on the left side of the road. Luckily the car is not manual because I am confident that I am not capable of shifting gears with my left hand. That just seems silly and unnatural. Like white men dancing.
Anyway, we are going to stay two nights at the finish line of the Great Ocean Road in some seedy hostel. It should be a great time.
I will update part 2 later because we are walking out of the internet cafe right now in order to hit the road!
Peace
Since my last post there has been several exciting developments. Riley's knee is officially torn, but he has taken a page out of Tom Selleck's book and grown a mustache. Incidentally, when you have a mustache you are no longer prone to the effects of pain.
That being said, we are taking two adventures in two weeks. The first of which begins in two hours.
Part 1: The Great Ocean Road
The Great Ocean Road is the iconic drive along the coast headed West out of Melbourne. It is home to the Twelve Apostles...
All five room mates are attending the journey and we are taking a hilarious old station wagon. I am looking forward to driving for the first time in 7 MONTHS. Chew on that for a while. Since being 16 I have driven a car almost every day. Now I get to completely relearn everything by driving on the left side of the road. Luckily the car is not manual because I am confident that I am not capable of shifting gears with my left hand. That just seems silly and unnatural. Like white men dancing.
Anyway, we are going to stay two nights at the finish line of the Great Ocean Road in some seedy hostel. It should be a great time.
I will update part 2 later because we are walking out of the internet cafe right now in order to hit the road!
Peace
Monday, April 26, 2010
BOOM goes the ACL...
Bad News. In our game last Saturday, Riley, most likely, re-tore his ACL. He is pretty confident that it is torn again because it feels just like the last time he did it. Unfortunately, along with no lacrosse, that means he can no longer work/afford to live here so if it is actually torn, he will probably have to get surgery and leave. Major bummer.
This makes lacrosse a little less of a priority. I am tempted to go traveling the east coast for a month or so and bail. We'll see. This is where you all come in...
Does anyone (perhaps a recent graduate or someone unhappy with their current job) feel like leaving the US of A and renting a van and driving the east coast of Australia? I am dead serious. It is supposed to be an amazing drive and I dont want to leave without doing it. Drop me a line at wesmcg@gmail.com if you are interested!
Cheers. Drop Riley a line as well to wish him well. Kid deserves it.
This makes lacrosse a little less of a priority. I am tempted to go traveling the east coast for a month or so and bail. We'll see. This is where you all come in...
Does anyone (perhaps a recent graduate or someone unhappy with their current job) feel like leaving the US of A and renting a van and driving the east coast of Australia? I am dead serious. It is supposed to be an amazing drive and I dont want to leave without doing it. Drop me a line at wesmcg@gmail.com if you are interested!
Cheers. Drop Riley a line as well to wish him well. Kid deserves it.
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